My dad's blue jeans and a few of his button down shirts have been transformed into a blanket. Nothing fancy, more utilitarian - just like him.
I miss him. Not every moment or every day, but regularly. Part of me wants to set a place for him at the table on Thanksgiving. But I worry; will that honor him or just remind us all of his absence? And what's right for me, might not be what's best for my mom. Sigh. It's hard to know what to do.
2 comments:
For us we celebrate my father's birthday and ignore the day he died. But that is us and yes, it has to fit for your family. At my dad's funeral a relative who lost her dad young said you will miss him every day. She is right. I have missed my dad every day for 26 years. What is best for your mom is hard to know. She once said to her kids that she was thankful to have married my dad, no matter how much she missed him.
The firsts are always hard. Talk to your mom, ask her if there’s a way to include him and start a new family tradition. In our house, we use the “flat plates” because my late BIL didn’t like sloping, “bowl-like” ones. The kids always bring up the stories of how he’d complain about the fancy holiday ones and laugh because we use the every day ones. When my kids are home (sis and I share a house now, my adult kids live 7+ hrs away)), they always bring their dad’s memory in the form of a $5 bill & a newspaper left somewhere for me to find. It’s our little joke. Both guys have been gone for 8 & 11 yrs, took us a while to find what helps-our kids had the ideas.
I think of you often. Keep sharing about him, it helps.
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